His hair was perfect

Since when have beards been news?

I flicked on ITV news this morning only to be confronted by some unrecogniseable author telling the anchors that beards are pure vanity and Prince William shouldn't be allowed to grow one. Of course this chap didn't have a speck of hair on his tubby face, and I'm willing to bet that if he did decide to grow some facial foliage he would end up looking like a toddler who has got hold of a Biro and scribbled randomly across its chin.

I myself sport a beard which ranges from quite carefully tended and trimmed to, more often than not, fairly untamed and bushy. I do not see this as an act of vanity, if anything it is laziness which buys me five extra minutes in bed each morning, but since growing a beard I have been amazed by the number of people who have felt the need to pass comment on it.

Facial hair has become so naff in the eyes of the general public that people can actually raise money by letting their inner primate out. My friend recently participated in 'Movember', a charity event which originated in Australia, where men are sponsored to grow a moustache during the eleventh month. But if you think about it participants are actually receiving money for being lazier than usual, as they have a whole lip-worth of face which they no longer have to regularly shave.

It seems strange that something which is essentially a natural part of life can actually go so out of fashion, to the extent that people seem surprised if anyone under the age of about 40 grows some chin cover, and now the heir to the throne has decided to bin his Mach 3 it is actually making headlines.

What will outrage the media next? "Harry in hat-wearing scandal"? "Revealed: Camilla wears contact lenses!"? It's ridiculous that we are actually using time which is supposed to be for news to discuss whether it's a good idea for the little prince to experiment with five o'clock shadow.

I realise the irony of complaining about something not being newsworthy then dedicating a whole blog to it, but as a militant beard-wearer I thought someone had to speak up. I don't care if it is no longer the mode, facial hair now has the royal seal of approval and all I can say is leave beardies alone!